We cannot see the grandparents often. How can I involve them more?

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Children grow up fast, so keep grandparents up to date with news by phoning or writing often and sending regular photos. Soon your child will be able to use the phone or write letters. Record your child’s voice on tape, or make a videotape to send.

What’s a good way of dealing with interfering grandparents?

This can be difficult. Sometimes your becoming a parent is like an instant replay of your parent’s own early parenting days. Their well-meant advice can be a way of reliving their past. When they have “stepped over the line,” tell them how much you appreciate their kindness, but that you really want to do things your own way. Be clear and respectful that you are not rejecting them, and at the same time try to involve them in more neutral issues.

How can grandparents help?

The most precious thing grandparents can give is time to spend with your child. Even if they still work outside the home, grandparents are not under the same pressures as you are and can provide a different perspective. As a result, a child’s bond with a grandparent is often strong, special and enduring.


Brazelton, Dr. T. Berry. Touchpoints: Your Child’s Emotional and Behavioral Development. Reading, Mass.: Perseus Books, 1992

Cooper, Dr. Carol. The Baby and Child Question and Answer Book. London, England: Dorling Kindersley Book, 2000

Reisser, Dr. Paul C. Baby and Child Care. Weaton Ill.: Tyndale House Publishers, 1997

How can I encourage my child to have a good relationship with his/her grandparents?

By the time your child is 18 months, he/she can tell them about new experiences, such as events of the day. Talk to your child often about his grandparents. If ever your parents or your partner’s parents annoy you, try not to express negative thoughts in front of your child.